Sleep deprivation
ANTOINETTE:
Hi Meg
I have just come back from seeing a very close friend of mine who’s little baby girl is only 5 weeks old. My friend and her husband are now at that stage of total sleep deprivation and total bliss. That stage where you start to do something and it never gets finished, you cant concentrate on anything let alone a conversation, you have so many questions and worries about whether or not you are doing it right - holding her right, burping her properly, why is she crying…? The stage of being totally in love with this tiny little person when each noise from her is a joy, and a little smile from her can make it all worth while. This is the stage in your life when you run on autopilot. You dont know where the energy comes from to wake up every 2-3 hours to feed your baby, you get nothing done, but are exhausted, life is a blur of feeding, pacing the floor and trying to get some rest.
My friend looks amazing, despite her lack of sleep. Being such a close friend though I could see the strain of it all. Looking down at her baby girl I wondered if I could do it all again. Everything about me says - Yes, 1 more baby. Despite traumatic events surrounding both my boys births, despite knowing I will be so tired, I can safely say I would do it again. Logic says no. Emotions say yes. Nature is amazing… it makes us forget exactly how bad it was….the joys of having this little person are the things I remember most. Nature wants us to have more babies. When I am asked when is the right time to have kids I always say “If I had know how hard motherhood was I would have waited 5 years. If I had know how wonderful motherhood was I would have done it 10 years earlier.”
MEG:
Hi Nette
I know what you mean - I am not sure if there is any stage in our lives when we are as much of an emotional wreck. Do you remember that day when James (nearly 10) was 10 weeks old and I came to your flat - I was so tired and so emotional I could not do another moment of mothering. I just handed him to you and left. I went off to the shops to feel human again for a little bit and when I returned he had cried for what felt like ages to you. I was a basket case that day! But on the whole I just loved being a new mom - such conflicting feelings!
Meg
HI MEG
MY WIFE AND I ARE ALSO SUFFERING FROM SLEEP DEPRIVATION TOO! OURS GOES A LITTLE FURTHER BACK. CHLOE IS NOW TURNING TWO, AND STILL NOT SLEEPING RIGHT THROUGH THE NIGHT. IN FACT SHE NEVER HAS… AFTER READING A FEW OF THE LETTERS, I REALISE THE FOLLOWING;
CHLOE HAS NO CONSTANT SLEEP PATTERN, THERE IS NO QUIET TIME FOR HER, BATH TIME IS ALWAYS IRREGULAR, AND THE TV IS ALWAYS ON. WE HAVE MOVED BACK IN WITH OUR FAMILY PENDING THE BUILD OF OUR PLACE. EVEN DURING THE DAY HER SLEEP PATTERN IS NOT THERE CONSTANTLY. MY PARENTS ARE OF THE OLD METHODOLOGY, WE HAVE RAISED FIVE CHILDREN, WE DON’T NEED NO EXPERT TRAINING OR ADVICE! THAT TO ME IS PLAIN STUPID AND I HAVE HAD ENOUGH! WE NEED YOUR HELP IN ORDER TO ESTABLISH A PATTERN WHERE OUR CHLOE CAN SLEEP RIGHT THROUGH THE NIGHT! MY WIFE IS BEYOND EXHAUSTED AND PREGNANT WITH OUR SECOND, SHE HAS BEEN GOING THROUGH THE NUMEROUS WAKE UPS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT FOR TWO YEARS NOW!
CHLOE IS ROCKED TO SLEEP WITH A BOTTLE, THEN SHE SLEEPS IN HER COT, BUT EVERY SO OFTEN IS WAKES, EITHER FOR BOTTLE WHICH SHE IS GIVEN OR FOR COMFORT. ITS MOANS AND GROANS THROUGH OUT THE NIGHT AND NO SLEEP IS DONE….
AMAZINGLY ENOUGH, WHEN SHE WAKES UP, SHE HAS MORE ENERGY THAN THE WHOLE HOUSEHOLD
PLEASE HELP OUT MEG….
GEORGE