Help. We moved home and Tom is unsettled.
Hi Meg
We moved home last week and we are battling a little with Tom (3). He is so unsettled and doesn’t want to sleep in his new room most days. He has had some almighty melt downs. We have only been here 3 days and he has asked to go back to his old house. We gave him a few small gifts when we arrived in the new house to make it welcoming and he is really enjoying the extra space. We still have boxes everywhere and most of his toys are still packed away. There is a play room in our new house, so once everything is unpacked I am sure he will love this space. I am so worried for him though. It has taken over an hour to get him to sleep each night as he cries so much and becomes quite stressed.
Any ideas on how I can make this transition easier for him?
Hi Nette
Any upheaval is hard for toddlers and they manage to spin it out into quite story. You are right in that as soon as his room and toys are set up, he will settle down. So I would make those the priority. Interestingly I am reading a great book on developing emotional intelligence and coping skills in babies and toddlers. One of the key things is to help them name and claim their emotions. I would verbalize how he is feeling - “Tom, you are missing your old room/ toy box, mummy misses the pretty garden too, but look at xyz, how nice to have space and your own play space.” It will help him feel validated and understand his emotions. Another idea is to buy him a little indoor tent and set it up in the play room as his special place. When he feels unsettled this can be his own corner.
Finally if you find his sleep becomes unsettled and he comes through to your room at night, don’t be too rigid but let him cuddle, even if its next to your bed on a matress on the floor. This is a classic age for night time insecurities and they will be heightened if he is unsettled.
Enjoy your new space! can’t wait to come over for a cuppa tea!
Meg