I’m always so surprised that the Gina Ford formal mechanical view on breasfeeding (and sleeping - my other bugbear!) is ever followed let alone dispensed. They’re babies not robots! I had twins over seven years ago and was lucky enough to have come across Brenda Pierce (a Jo’burg lactation consultant)in addition to having decided to breastfeed before my daughters were born. I initially had engorgement problems abd felt that I’d been attached by Kreepy Krawleys (the suction power was so strong and so totally unexpected!)so was very uncomfortable to begin with, but settled into a year of happily feeding both on demand and usually at the same time. There are two tricks I found worked for me. One - don’t worry about how much or how often - that’s something the baby will decide. It’s too easy to obsess about quantities and weight gain. No baby will starve itself! Two - don’t supplement, it WILL derease your supply. It may also make your baby “lazy” - remember getting milk out of a bottle is easier than having to get it the natural way - and then baby may refuse to take the breast alltogether.
As for the rest try to “go with the flow” and talk to other women who breast feed (they have breasts - a teeny advantage over some of the male paeds!) - some of the tips may not work for you but some are really practical.

I am a new mommy. My little lad named Nathan was put to breast about an hour after he was born naturally. After a good latch and several stiches later I thought breast feeding would be a breeze.

The hosiptal staff were amazing however gave me contactictory advice to what the paed had given me.

I have been through cracked and bleeding nipples twice.
My ante natal instructor is wonderful and has supported me in times when i wanted to give up breastfeeding.

The worst advice I received was from my mother-in-law!

I am also well read in terms of books! AND in all honesty I think some are so strict they take the element of bonding moments with your bundle of joy. The one book I have read, in my opinion, puts the mother first ensuring a routine to accomodate life.

But the best advice is to take a moment back, listen to your baby (or read his mind - or little facial expressions) and do what is best for you and baby, knowing you are the best mom for him or her! Life is going to stop, washing is not going to be done and you will be tired!

But love every moment of it as this too shall pass!

Looking back, I realise I could’ve done a few things differently and hope that I can do apply these new tactics to the next baba that we hope comes along.
- I stuck to the 3 hour feeding schedule rigidly from birth, which I now realise does not have to be… why not feed every 2 hours for the first month to get the milk flowing plentifully, if it seems you are not producing like a jersey cow?
- I did not rest at all. I am a busy person and a do-er… always want to have things done NOW. So, I kept myself physically busy re-arranging my house with the new baby’s presence and goodies… constantly at my PC reading up on baby things…. I am sure my body would’ve produced more milk if I have rested it.
- Also, (without wanting to attract attack) I battle to accept the concept that some woman just can’t breastfeed (even though it was a challenge for me and my son) as I always think of the “cave days” - what would they have done if they couldnt breastfeed? Surely every mother of a newborn (be it an animal or human) should be equipped by nature to breastfeed, is what kept going through my mind. Is it because there is the formula option, that we give in too soon?
- I was advised by my mother-in-law to feed my son porridge at 3 weeks!!!! the kind of advice and pressure I got was what certainly took me down the wrong road… as being a new mum, worried about my skinny baby putting on only 100 gms a week, one tends to start taking anyone’s advice which was wrong! I should’ve found a lactation consultant and only followed her advice.

Who knows what may happen with our next… maybe I’ll battle even more… but I hope I can, with the help of the new book, beat the challenges and make it a natural experience.

I was one of the lucky ones. Breastfeeding went so well for me. Not only did Thomas feed and sleep well, but it all came so naturally. Daniel was born extremely ill and was not interested in feeding from me before he went into intensive care for 3 weeks. For 2 weeks I was unable to feed him as he was medically paralised. I remember clearly on the night he was born a nurse helping me to express colostrum by hand. In total over 3 days I got a tiny 7ml’s out and I was terrified that my milk would dry up due to the stress and him not feeding from me.

With the help of amazing nurses and doctors who encouraged me I was expressing and filling freezer draws with milk within a few days. The moment Daniel was given those 7ml’s I first expressed will stay with me for the rest of my life. Eventhough it was down a tube it was better than nothing.

I remember feeding Daniel for the first time, tubes, wires and beeping machines attached, but a moment impressed on me for the rest of my life. It would have been easier to just give up, but I persevered and was amazed that it happend again.

Even though I was lucky and was able to feed easily, there are those tough times where boobs are sore, or nipples are sore, or it just takes too long, or you are just too tired. I clearly remember sitting and feeding while my tears fell onto my baby. It is hard to do and it is a sacrifice, but at the same time such a reward to know how special that time is.

I have been lucky enough to have had no problems with breastfeeding or milk supply - must be some Jersey cow genes lurking in the branches of my family tree! My baby boy latched on with no argument 45 mins after he was delivered and has fed well ever since, gaining around 250gr a week.

That said, I found the ‘advice’ I was given at antenatal classes and in hospital was useless to me and I discarded most of it almost immediately. For example, the midwife in our antenatal class demonstrated the latching position we were supposed to use - holding baby horizontally against our bodies, latched onto one breast and tucked against the other. This didn’t work for a few reasons: my breast kept covering my baby’s nose; the position was uncomfortable for both of us; my little chap was bringing up half his feed every feed (how much would you keep down drinking juice whilst lying on your side?)and all this led to sore nipples and an irritable mom! I now cradle him with his bum in my lap and it works beautifully for both of us.

Also, I was told to feed him for 10 minutes on each breast every three hours for the first week and then increase by 5 minutes per breast during the second week and another 5 minutes per breast from the third week onwards. The trouble with this is that he was never on a breast for long enough to empty it so I was engorged and he was only getting the watery foremilk meaning he was hungry again long before the 3 hour mark. I now let him empty a breast before switching to the other and he happily goes for four hours between feeds during the day and has been sleeping through the night regularly since 6 weeks :)

The advice that was worth taking was to eat well and drink lots of water, to rest often, be relaxed about the process and to feed often - during growth spurts he sometimes wanted feeding every 2 hours which sated his hunger and got my body producing extra milk for his needs. Breastfeeding is a natural process, and I think moms just need to be natural about it, advice can be a good thing but it can also cause needless anxiety if you’re trying to force yourself and your little one into something that doesn’t work for either of you.

Reading your story brought back so much memories! Breastfeeding was fine but my baby still did not pick up weight as much as was “required”. I then had to supplement with formula which just made me feel awful. It led to weeks of me feeling miserable and that I was a failure.

Looking back, I’ve learnt so much and I know I did the best I could - especially as a new mom!

I look forward to reading Feeding Sense for my second time round.

Good luck with the book.
Mel